Arrived back from Melbourne yesterday afternoon and have settled back into life at the Bachelor Pad. I managed my way through the first half of The Dark Knight before crawling to bed - yes, even day flights are tiring! Waiting text messages this morning indicated that I'd been asleep since at least 9pm. 9pm!!! I woke at 5.30am this morning and then forced myself to go back to sleep as 5.30am is an entirely inappropriate time to be up when you're still on holidays. As it turned out I was up around 7.30am. Seeing what goes on in the Heartlands at 7.30 is quite amazing. Usually if I'm up at this time I'm in a vague, cloudy state as I make my way to the MRT for work. People doing their shopping, buying their morning iced coffee in a plastic bag with a straw... it's like a whole new world!
Some people say that going to bed early is the key to a healthy day ahead. I'm not too sure exactly who these people are but I have to say that they may be onto something. Having had such a massive sleep the usual cloudiness of morning was shattered. I was... a-w-a-k-e! I actually rate this concept highly. My mind seems to be working slightly faster than usual. I'm not as grumpy (hehe). The problem becomes that it's just impossible for me to go to bed at this time. I'm a nightowl and if I went to bed at 9 then I'd just be lying there frustrated until at least 11.30. Sigh... might have to utterly exaust myself more often then.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Exit Strategies
Have to say, Singapore will need to pull some magical, million dollar note dispensing rabbit out of its hat to convince me to stay. You'd be really surprised at how far along my exit strategy is. Yes, I actually have an "exit strategy". I'm officially an adult.
I have a definite contracted job to return to, should have accommodation sorted by the time I leave Melbourne and have started doing the maths on how much money I'll need to buy a car etc. I'm still going to cast a line for positions in Canada and Japan but I think coming back here suits me best. Over the next month I miss concerts by Public Enemy, TZU, Neil Young alone! Very biased as this is hardcore concert season in Australia, but after a year and a half of covers I find I really miss venues like The Forum, The Prince of Wales and St Jeromes.
The only caveat on returning is that I won't be staying at my parents place, not even for one night. That just can't happen. Hence why I need an actual strategy for my return here. I don't need to give work notice until sometime in March so Singapore and the Gods of Romance have rapid work ahead of me in order to convince me to remain there.
I have a definite contracted job to return to, should have accommodation sorted by the time I leave Melbourne and have started doing the maths on how much money I'll need to buy a car etc. I'm still going to cast a line for positions in Canada and Japan but I think coming back here suits me best. Over the next month I miss concerts by Public Enemy, TZU, Neil Young alone! Very biased as this is hardcore concert season in Australia, but after a year and a half of covers I find I really miss venues like The Forum, The Prince of Wales and St Jeromes.
The only caveat on returning is that I won't be staying at my parents place, not even for one night. That just can't happen. Hence why I need an actual strategy for my return here. I don't need to give work notice until sometime in March so Singapore and the Gods of Romance have rapid work ahead of me in order to convince me to remain there.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
"Let Jakey do it!"
In the past year and a half I've spent more time around babies and toddlers than I have in my life. Despite a basketball team's worth of siblings, none of us have yet added to the family name (or anyone else's for that matter!). While in Singapore, I have had frequent occasion to hang out with my friend's son at barbeques and football nights and the like. His son, Billy, seems to love me and frankly I respond well to kids and they to me. Must be a similar mental plane thing, I guess. Billy is a cute kid whose Mum stays at home much of the time to look after him and was aided by a maid when Mum was at work. He's two and a half years old and I can rarely understand a word he says.
Last night I went to my ex-girlfriend's house. We haven't seen each other obviously for over a year and a half and her boy Jake is now a real human being, far from the infantile poo machine I saw when I left. My ex and her husband both work full-time and Jake is sent to childcare during the day. I've always had a bit of a thing about childcare. I think it's a really wonderful thing, especially in a world where increasingly the average family is required to have two incomes just to make ends meet. However, on a personal level, and given my own vocational field, the idea of leaving my kid in the care of someone I don't know and may not be properly qualified kind of gives me the creeps. Many years ago I used to occasionally go out to the pub with my younger brother and we'd meet girls that he knew or who were friends of his friends. If I had a dollar for every 19-20 year old girl I met in that bar who was a childcare worker with no recognisable qualifications I'd have... well... at least enough for a round of drinks for the boys. Additionally these girls were hardly paragons of responsibility when you enquired about their job and what they did each day and how seriously they actually took it.
...breath...
So little Jake goes to daycare now. We went and picked him up, drove back to her place and ordered a pizza. Jake and I re-bonded over the Incredibles and he was even calling me Daddy after I cut up pizza for him and fed it to him. My ex was highly amused by this and impressed that Jake took such a quick shine to me; not always the easiest of feats with a two and a half year old. Me? Well the whole Daddy thing creeped me out a little in a sense of "oh.. what might have been..." but I had such a lovely time. I think the best thing was seeing how much my ex loved her role as a mother; a role she deeply feared all through the pregnancy. Ultimately, I saw that she was happy and that in turn made me happy. My ex is family to me and you always want what's best for family.
... double breath...
The point of all this was the sheer difference between Jake and Billy. Exactly the same age. One in daycare. One at home with Mum. I realise kids learn and develop at significantly different rates but I couldn't help but wonder. Jake's vocbulary was better. He listened to his Mum (and me!) more than Billy. He interacted in a more social way than Billy is able to. I realise this is all highly circumstantial and an unfair comparison given learning rates etc. But as I said, I can't help but wonder whether childcare is actually better for a child's development than being at home with Mum (sans brothers and sisters in both cases).
Scary/Amazong moment :
As my ex went to put on the Incredibles DVD, Jake shouted "Let Jakey do it!". My ex gave him the dvd, and he opened the wooden cabinet with the "child-proof" lock on it, then proceeded to press the eject button, insert the dvd and set it all playing for himself.
That boy will be surfing the Net and responding to this blog before either of us knows it methinks.
Last night I went to my ex-girlfriend's house. We haven't seen each other obviously for over a year and a half and her boy Jake is now a real human being, far from the infantile poo machine I saw when I left. My ex and her husband both work full-time and Jake is sent to childcare during the day. I've always had a bit of a thing about childcare. I think it's a really wonderful thing, especially in a world where increasingly the average family is required to have two incomes just to make ends meet. However, on a personal level, and given my own vocational field, the idea of leaving my kid in the care of someone I don't know and may not be properly qualified kind of gives me the creeps. Many years ago I used to occasionally go out to the pub with my younger brother and we'd meet girls that he knew or who were friends of his friends. If I had a dollar for every 19-20 year old girl I met in that bar who was a childcare worker with no recognisable qualifications I'd have... well... at least enough for a round of drinks for the boys. Additionally these girls were hardly paragons of responsibility when you enquired about their job and what they did each day and how seriously they actually took it.
...breath...
So little Jake goes to daycare now. We went and picked him up, drove back to her place and ordered a pizza. Jake and I re-bonded over the Incredibles and he was even calling me Daddy after I cut up pizza for him and fed it to him. My ex was highly amused by this and impressed that Jake took such a quick shine to me; not always the easiest of feats with a two and a half year old. Me? Well the whole Daddy thing creeped me out a little in a sense of "oh.. what might have been..." but I had such a lovely time. I think the best thing was seeing how much my ex loved her role as a mother; a role she deeply feared all through the pregnancy. Ultimately, I saw that she was happy and that in turn made me happy. My ex is family to me and you always want what's best for family.
... double breath...
The point of all this was the sheer difference between Jake and Billy. Exactly the same age. One in daycare. One at home with Mum. I realise kids learn and develop at significantly different rates but I couldn't help but wonder. Jake's vocbulary was better. He listened to his Mum (and me!) more than Billy. He interacted in a more social way than Billy is able to. I realise this is all highly circumstantial and an unfair comparison given learning rates etc. But as I said, I can't help but wonder whether childcare is actually better for a child's development than being at home with Mum (sans brothers and sisters in both cases).
Scary/Amazong moment :
As my ex went to put on the Incredibles DVD, Jake shouted "Let Jakey do it!". My ex gave him the dvd, and he opened the wooden cabinet with the "child-proof" lock on it, then proceeded to press the eject button, insert the dvd and set it all playing for himself.
That boy will be surfing the Net and responding to this blog before either of us knows it methinks.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Changi here I come
I'm a disgusting tech whore who is taking home more electrical devices than I am clothes. I don't know if I should be whipped or worshipped.
I dreamt I was in a Singaporean prison the other night. In case it is news to anyone, bad things happen to handsome young men in jails. I can't remember what I was in for. Whatever it was, it was a setup. I was to be incarcerated for one year and receive 50 strokes of the cane. Naturally they were dolling them out at six per day so that I would survive the experience. I was taken to a dungeonesque room for the whipping. To add insult to injury it was a particularly cute Chinese girl administering the punishment. She said she was sorry for this, to turn over and face down. I awoke to the Chinese girl's face asking if I was ok. I asked when the caning would begin. She said she'd already given all six and that I had passed out somewhere between the first and the second stroke.
The less said about the shower scene the better, but I do have to comment on what I was thinking throughout the dream. Walking back and forth in my cell during the first couple of days I found myself praying that they had a library and that I could use it. I could leave jail a genius!!
Sigh... if only.
I dreamt I was in a Singaporean prison the other night. In case it is news to anyone, bad things happen to handsome young men in jails. I can't remember what I was in for. Whatever it was, it was a setup. I was to be incarcerated for one year and receive 50 strokes of the cane. Naturally they were dolling them out at six per day so that I would survive the experience. I was taken to a dungeonesque room for the whipping. To add insult to injury it was a particularly cute Chinese girl administering the punishment. She said she was sorry for this, to turn over and face down. I awoke to the Chinese girl's face asking if I was ok. I asked when the caning would begin. She said she'd already given all six and that I had passed out somewhere between the first and the second stroke.
The less said about the shower scene the better, but I do have to comment on what I was thinking throughout the dream. Walking back and forth in my cell during the first couple of days I found myself praying that they had a library and that I could use it. I could leave jail a genius!!
Sigh... if only.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Will be grouchy if work calls me early tomorrow
Gave in to stomachy temptation and changed my flights so I'm heading back to Melbourne a couple of days earlier. When I booked in May I was able to get 10 days back home for a reasonable price but any more than that was an extra $800!! When I called today they told me I could extend in any way I wanted free of charge. Is the economy really $800 worse off? I couch that in terms of things that we (expats anyhow) have to pay. Either way I have just another reason to praise global downturns. I know this is all going to suck for far too many to count, but frankly this works in my favour.
As much as I say it's all about my stomach I realised today that the fact is that I'm just a bit homesick. Can't wait to see my sisters and my parents. Very concerned about my eldest sister. She asked me to stay at her place if I want to on the pretext that her airedale needs some looking after. So I'll do as she asks. Of course it's just to look after the airedale. For a dog-hater I'm good like that ;)
That, and I just have the strong need to get away from Singapore.
For the last 9 months I've been hating my job. Largely because I didn't think I was doing it as well as I'm capable, so distracted was I by my study. The last two days? I loved being there. Honestly. I forgot that I used to love that feeling. In conversation today the concept of introverts and extroverts came up. Noone ever believes that I'm actually very shy. They laugh when I tell them I used to skip any kind of presentation at university because I couldn't bear the thought of being in front of even 10 people let alone the amounts I deal with now. 10%? Who really cares? I'd rather take my chances out of 90% than take my chances with the slavering beasties that make up university tutorial groups. Anyhow, there it is. I'm not what I appear to be. Terrifying, isn't it? Not as terrifying as doing a job you hate. So I'm happy because work has made me happy after so long.
It's been a Ben Folds kind of night. The first two are just two of the most gorgeous songs ever written and the third just an excellent cover.
As much as I say it's all about my stomach I realised today that the fact is that I'm just a bit homesick. Can't wait to see my sisters and my parents. Very concerned about my eldest sister. She asked me to stay at her place if I want to on the pretext that her airedale needs some looking after. So I'll do as she asks. Of course it's just to look after the airedale. For a dog-hater I'm good like that ;)
That, and I just have the strong need to get away from Singapore.
For the last 9 months I've been hating my job. Largely because I didn't think I was doing it as well as I'm capable, so distracted was I by my study. The last two days? I loved being there. Honestly. I forgot that I used to love that feeling. In conversation today the concept of introverts and extroverts came up. Noone ever believes that I'm actually very shy. They laugh when I tell them I used to skip any kind of presentation at university because I couldn't bear the thought of being in front of even 10 people let alone the amounts I deal with now. 10%? Who really cares? I'd rather take my chances out of 90% than take my chances with the slavering beasties that make up university tutorial groups. Anyhow, there it is. I'm not what I appear to be. Terrifying, isn't it? Not as terrifying as doing a job you hate. So I'm happy because work has made me happy after so long.
It's been a Ben Folds kind of night. The first two are just two of the most gorgeous songs ever written and the third just an excellent cover.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Over and Done
Got the final word today that my portfolio has finally (17 days by registered post?!) arrived in London. After sitting through the exam this was the final nail, despite it having been sent well before the exam. The exam itself was tolerable. Three and a half hours went by in a jiff and I wouldn't have complained too much if there were an extra 15 minutes tacked onto that. Don't ask if I think I passed. I'll leave that mystery until the end of February when results come out.
Spent Sunday afternoon (and Monday afternoon for that matter) at Funan. Over six floors of geeky tech goodness. I walked away with the Lego Batman game which I'd been putting off until post-exam anyhow and a new portable hard-drive. Scary how last time I was seriously looking, when I bought this laptop 18 months ago, the technology was primitive by comparison. I'm someone who keeps very abreast of these things, but storage space is just in all new dizzy (and cheap) realms these days.
Received a blind date email via an acquaintance asking if I wanted to go for a beer. The common ground being that we've both lived in Shanghai. I might just let that one broil until after I'm back from Australia. Blind dates aren't really my thing but the counterbalance being that making new friends doesn't really hurt. All this as long as I can keep it straddled in the friendship zone. In Singapore I find that's often beyond my control, but I have given up on taking responsibility for other people's emotions. As long as I'm honest and say exactly how I feel or what I'm capable of then I'm really unable to do much if others descend into total fantasy land.
Am going to call SIA sometime this week and see if, in these wacky economic bust days, I can extend my stay at home for a few extra days. 10 days just isn't going to be enough. In typical Singaporean fashion I've come to this conclusion by consulting my stomach. There's actually just not enough days to eat all the things I want to eat!
Spent Sunday afternoon (and Monday afternoon for that matter) at Funan. Over six floors of geeky tech goodness. I walked away with the Lego Batman game which I'd been putting off until post-exam anyhow and a new portable hard-drive. Scary how last time I was seriously looking, when I bought this laptop 18 months ago, the technology was primitive by comparison. I'm someone who keeps very abreast of these things, but storage space is just in all new dizzy (and cheap) realms these days.
Received a blind date email via an acquaintance asking if I wanted to go for a beer. The common ground being that we've both lived in Shanghai. I might just let that one broil until after I'm back from Australia. Blind dates aren't really my thing but the counterbalance being that making new friends doesn't really hurt. All this as long as I can keep it straddled in the friendship zone. In Singapore I find that's often beyond my control, but I have given up on taking responsibility for other people's emotions. As long as I'm honest and say exactly how I feel or what I'm capable of then I'm really unable to do much if others descend into total fantasy land.
Am going to call SIA sometime this week and see if, in these wacky economic bust days, I can extend my stay at home for a few extra days. 10 days just isn't going to be enough. In typical Singaporean fashion I've come to this conclusion by consulting my stomach. There's actually just not enough days to eat all the things I want to eat!
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